Recycling My Pain
2 Corinthians 12:7-10
As we wind up this series of the Road to Recovery this morning we are going to note the last step, which is represented by the letter Y. Y in the word recovery stands for Yield: Yield myself to God to be used to bring this Good News to others by both my example and my words. God wants to use your experiences to help other people. He wants to use YOU. He wants to recycle the pain in your life for the benefit of other people. Usually we think God only uses real gifted, real talented people. That's not true. God uses ordinary people. We may even pray, "God use my strength." God says, "No, I don't want to use your strength; I want to use your weaknesses." Why? Though people may be helped some by your strength, they are helped even more when you're honest about your weaknesses. You share your strength and many will say, "Big deal, I'll never have that." But you share your weaknesses and they will say, "I can relate to that." As you share from your hurts, habits, and hang-ups of things you're recovering from, God wants to use you and that's what Step 8, this final step, is all about. Yield myself to be used by God to bring this good news to others. As we look at the apostle Paul in just a moment in one of those "aha" moments that he had, this is a major point we need to get - he is going to share about a weakness he had, but he'll not share what he saw in the third heaven.
When you understand that God uses your weaknesses and pain, life takes on a whole new meaning. And when you begin to practice this step, then you have genuine recovery. The proof of recovery is when you begin to focus outside of yourself. That means you've really recovered. You stop being so self absorbed-MY needs, MY hurts, MY problems-and you start saying, "How can I help other people?" The proof of recovery is that you want to help others, not just keep focusing on what's happened to you.
So, understand this major marker in Paul's life,
2 Corinthians 12:7-10
12:7 And lest I should be exalted above measure by the abundance of the revelations, a thorn in the flesh was given to me, a messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I be exalted above measure.
12:8 Concerning this thing I pleaded with the Lord three times that it might depart from me.
12:9 And He said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
12:10 Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
I am sure you have heard many different people offer their opinion about this thorn in the flesh, this messenger of Satan. What/Who was it? Was it spiritual, physical, mental, emotional? Great questions. Some have suggested that this thorn in the flesh is: (a) Paul's opposition from his adversaries; (b) temptations from the devil; (c) some intense bodily pain; and (d) some recurring physical affliction such as eye trouble, epilepsy, or malaria. What was it? The bottom line is that we don't know. But it was a tool of Satan; it was painful; it was likely accompanied by shame and/or embarrassment to the apostle1; AND it was also used by the Lord to keep Paul humble (so he wouldn't stumble) and to bring glory to the Name of the Lord.
I'm grateful that we don't know exactly what this thorn was and how it affected Paul - so we can relate to him. And I'm grateful that Paul yielded himself to write about it so others can be helped. With this, I want to ask two questions:
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Why has God allowed my pain? Vv 7-10
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That God sovereignly allowed Paul to experience pain is beyond dispute. Paul had received revelations and had experiences that were no doubt way beyond what anyone has ever witnessed. And there would be a very real temptation to share with others what he saw, what he witnessed - not to share for information's sake, but to share as a form of pride to place himself above others. God was going to make sure that wouldn't happen. Why? God wanted to use Paul to share the gospel NOT his experience. He wanted to use Paul to preach grace, NOT some vision. It hasn't changed a bit, friend. If you are saved, God wants to use you to share the Good News with others.
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I want to give you some reasons why God may have allowed your pain:
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He has given me a free will. We see here Paul's confession that he is human. He had received these revelations and he was ready to share what he saw! Can you see him puffing up with pride and going on tour to share what he saw - and likely exaggerating or being more theatrical with each passing time of sharing? Pride was going to capture Paul.
I want to remind you that each of us has a free will. In the very first book of the Bible, Genesis, we are told that we were created in the image of God. That is, we have a choice. Adam and Eve had a choice. You can choose good or bad, right or wrong, evil or life. God says, "You can reject me or accept me. It's your choice." Some people blame God for putting the tree of the knowledge of good and evil in the Garden. "It's God's fault for putting it there. Adam and Eve should have sued God." No. God has given every one of us a choice. Why? God didn't want a bunch of puppets. He could have made you where you had no free will at all. But God wanted people who love Him voluntarily. You can't say you love somebody unless you have the opportunity to not love them. You can't say you're good unless you've had the option to be bad. So God has given you free will and free choice. And that free will comes with consequences.
That's why a free will can be a blessing or a burden - according to what we choose. And the bad choices cause all kinds of painful consequences in our life. So it's good that I am free and I can choose, but it's bad because I often choose the wrong thing and that causes pain in my life. Some choose to experiment with drugs, and they get addicted. Some choose to be sexually promiscuous, and get a disease. God says "Yes, I would like for you to NOT have this pain, but it's part of the package that comes with the free will."
Not only do you have a free will, but everyone else does too. And when others don't do the right thing, we get hurt. "Couldn't God have prevented that hurt from happening?" Yes, He could have. All He would have had to do would be to take away that person's free will to do wrong. But if He had done that, to be fair, He would have to have taken away your free will too. You see the dilemma? The problem is that by having a free will we get blessing (true love from others), but we also get a burden. God doesn't send anybody to hell; you choose to go there by rejecting everything that He does. He says, "I love you, I want you to be a part of my family." If you say, "Forget it God," thumb your nose, and walk out the door, you can't blame anybody but yourself. There is a free will. I like how Warren Wiersbe put it, "In His grace, God forgives our sins; but in His government, He must permit us to reap what we sow."2
He's given me a free will. Second,
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God uses pain to get our attention. Paul basically shares that he "went from paradise to pain, from glory to suffering. He tasted the blessing of God in heaven and then felt the buffeting of Satan on earth. [The word, buffet,] means "to beat, to strike with the fist." The tense of the verb indicates that this pain was either constant or recurring. When you stop to think that Paul had letters to write, trips to take, sermons to preach, churches to visit, and dangers to face as he ministered, you can understand that this was a serious matter."3
Pain is a serious matter to every person. But Paul's pain most certainly made him alert to seek God. Think of pain like a warning light, a buzzer, or an alarm. But understand that pain really isn't the problem. Paul thought the thorn in the flesh was his problem. It wasn't. It was God's way of getting Paul to understand a major principle and application for the rest of his life - the sufficiency of God's grace. Have you ever thought that God may be trying to get your attention? Someone said, "God whispers to us in our pleasures but He shouts to us in our pain." It's true that most of us don't change when we see the light, but rather when we feel the heat. That's why Solomon wrote (Proverbs 20:30), "Blows that hurt cleanse away evil, as do stripes the inner depths of the heart."
I'll bet you can ask a seasoned believer about some of the most meaningful times in their Christian life and they will tell you, not of the mountain peaks, but of the valleys. Why? When we're down, the only thing we can do is to look up. Jonah, in the midst of his running away from God (when he was in the belly of the whale) said (Jonah 2:7), "When I had lost all hope I once again turned my thoughts to the Lord." Isn't that a great verse? God uses pain to get our attention.
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God uses pain to teach me to depend on Him. That is very evident in this account. Paul came before the Lord complaining but left praising. Why? His dependence on the Lord was about to go to an unforgettable level. Think about it like this: "Two messages were involved in this painful experience. The thorn in the flesh was Satan's message to Paul, but God had another message for him, a message of grace. The tense of the verb in 2 Corinthians 12:9 is important: "And He [God] has once-for-all said to me." God gave Paul a message that stayed with him. [The message? "My grace is sufficient for you. My power is made perfect (it completes the task) only in weakness."]
Can I give you a key point to hold on to? "You don't know that God is all you need until God is all you've got." And He is all I need. If you never had a problem, you'd never know God could solve them. God allows pain to teach you to depend on Him. The psalmist said (Psalm 119:71), "It is good for me that I have been afflicted, that I may learn Your statutes." Have you ever heard anyone say, "You've got to be strong; you've got to be strong"? Do you know that is exactly opposite of what the Lord told Paul? Jesus told Paul, "The sooner you get weak, the sooner you'll know what real strength is." The Believer's Bible Commentary makes this statement, "Successful service for Christ depends on a weak servant. The weaker he is, the more the power of Christ accompanies his preaching."4 As I said last week, "I can't even walk, without You holding my hand."
"When the Lord explained the wisdom of His actions, Paul said in effect that that was the only way he would want it to be. So instead of complaining and grumbling about the thorn, he would rather boast in his infirmities. He would get down on his knees and thank the Lord for them. He would gladly endure them if only the power of Christ might rest upon him."5 Let me give you a fourth reason,
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God allows pain to give me a ministry to others. It makes me humble, sympathetic, and sensitive to others' needs. Let me give you an example. Before the Lord blessed us with Andrew, Bonnie had a miscarriage. Before this happened my thoughts were pretty much, "Bless their heart. They'll get over it. Not that big of a deal." And for the dads I really never gave much thought to their feelings - until we had a miscarriage. I was devastated. I was broken-hearted. I was hurting. In fact, after this happened I went to two men whose wives had recently had miscarriages and I told them that I was so sorry that I was insensitive to their hurt. Why? God allowed that pain in order for me to be a help to someone else. I can say to those that have experienced a miscarriage that I truly know how they are feeling.
You've had experiences in your life - good and bad. How are you going to use those? Have you ever thought that you could use them to minister to others at a point of great need in their lives? I am not an alcoholic, but I can relate to those that grew up in an alcoholic home. You, because of things that have happened in your life, can make a difference in others' lives, if you would just be willing to share it. Nobody is perfect. You have a hurt, a habit or a hang-up. And there are others around you that probably have that same hurt, habit or hang-up. Who better to help that person than you? God wants to use and recycle the pain in your life to help others, but you've got to be open and honest about it. If you keep that hurt to yourself, you're wasting it.
There's a beautiful story in the Bible, in Genesis, about the story of Joseph. He was so mistreated. People did incredible things to this guy. He was good guy. He didn't deserve the pain in his life. One day his brothers decided to gang up against him and sell him into slavery. And then they went back home and told their dad he'd been eaten by a lion. That's what I call a dysfunctional family. Major problem here. He's sold into slavery and taken from Israel into Egypt. He's doing his job, he's keeping his life pure and his master's wife tries to seduce him, and he says, "No that wouldn't be right." So she cries, "Rape!" He's falsely accused of rape and thrown into prison. The guy's whole life is downhill all the way. But God knew exactly what He was doing, putting him in position that raised him up to second in command in Egypt. And God used him to save not only one but two nations from destruction and famine. Later his brothers came to him to get food, expecting to have their heads cut off, and he says in Genesis 50:20, "You intended it to harm me, but God intended it for good." God's bigger than those people who hurt you. No matter what other people have done to you, God can turn it around and use it for good.
Joseph could say, "God never wastes a hurt." Don't you waste it either. God may never remove the thorn in your life, but I guarantee you that He'll give you what you most deeply need - His grace and His strength. But for us and others to witness that grace and strength, we'll have to be in the position that we are weak and helpless. Warren Wiersbe said, "Whenever you are going through suffering, spend extra time in the Word of God; and you can be sure God will speak to you. He always has a special message for His children when they are afflicted."6
"Physical affliction need not be a barrier to effective Christian service. Today's saints are too prone to pamper themselves and use every little ache or pain as an excuse to stay home from church or refuse to accept opportunities for service. Paul did not permit his thorn in the flesh to become a stumbling block. In fact, he let God turn that thorn into a stepping-stone."7 I want you to quickly see a second key point,
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How do I use my pain to help other people?
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Are you ready to share? Peter said (1 Peter 3:15, NIV), "Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you for the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect."
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Two keys to sharing:
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Preparation. Some work needs to be done beforehand in order to share effectively. Here's what to do:
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Make a list of all the experiences you've had in life to this day, positive and negative - one's you've experienced and ones you caused.
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Ask, "What did I learn from that experience? How did God help me make it through that tough time?" Ask God, "How did You help me through that tough time?"
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Write out your story on paper. Why? Thoughts disentangle themselves when they pass through the lips and fingertips.
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Ask yourself, "Who could best benefit from hearing my story?" The answer is people who are going through, right now, what you've already gone through, who are just a little bit behind you in the process. And then say to God, "I am available." Then get ready. Because if you get ready to share the good news about God of how God has worked in your life, He will wear you out. There are people who need to hear your story all over this world, who are going through what you've gone through. Next,
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Presentation. It matters how you present your story.
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Be humble. When you share your story, think of it as one beggar telling another beggar where to find bread. You're not saying, "I've got it all together," because you don't. You're getting it all together. You're on the road to recovery. As you're getting it all together, be humble and say, "We're all in this together; here's what happened to me."
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Be real. Be honest about your hurts and faults. We've seen this modeled by those that have shared their stories, and we'll see it again in just a moment. Do you realize the courage it took for those people to stand up here and do that? I'm grateful to be a part of a church family where real people can share real problems and real solutions without feeling put down or feeling guilty about it. We are committed to maintaining that atmosphere of love and care for one another in this church. You help other people by being honest about your hurts. It helps them open up. The other amazing thing is when you share your story it not only gives hope to them but gives healing to you. Every time you share your story with somebody, you get a little bit stronger. You're healed a little bit more. People join Celebrate Recovery because of their pain, but they stay in Celebrate Recovery because of their growth.
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Don't lecture. Just share your story.
I want to leave you with four action steps this morning:
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If you have not yet committed your life to Jesus Christ, do so today. What are you waiting on? The greatest tragedy would be for you to go all the way through this series, hear these great truths, and the hope that it brings, and not do anything about it, like giving your life to Christ. If you haven't done so, do so today.
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Write out your story. God wants to use you to help others.
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Commit yourself to some church family, the Maysville Baptist Church family, for support. Not just attending in worship, but getting involved in Sunday School. You need others.
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Ask God to give you somebody you could share your story with, to share the good news of how God can make the difference in somebody's life. There are two things you cannot do in heaven - sin and share the good news with others. Why do you think God left you here believer - it's to share the greatest news of all. You don't need Bible knowledge near as much as you need a broken heart. The apostle Paul said, "Nothing is more important than doing what God has called me to do." I make no apology whatsoever in saying that maybe the most significant thing you do with your life is first, give your life to Christ, become a part of Maysville Baptist's family, get involved in a ministry, start sharing your story. It will far outlast anything you do in your career, far outlast anything you do in your hobby, because what we're talking about here has eternal implications, getting people from darkness into light, from hell into heaven, from an eternity without God to an eternity with God, and people will be thanking you the rest of eternity. There is no more significant cause in life. It's decision time right now.